Monday, December 19, 2011

Let me die

Love is a lie. Trust is a lie. Compassion- so rare that you might as well be digging for diamonds in your backyard,and usually if you find it, there is a selfish motive behind it.

Shot down, once again.

This time I don't want to recover. I've said it before, but you know, most people are just naturally surrounded by friends and family, and can't imagine any other way. My family destroyed me and then abandoned me, and every friend I've ever had has done the same. The only people I have to turn to are thousands of miles away and have not spent enough time around me to know that I am toxic.

(And on the off chance that you still care enough to read this...I kept talking. You not only shut me down, but you also were the first to delete me from every place where we are "friends"...yet you still say I abandoned you? You are full of shit. I don't deny being a miserable pile of puke myself, but I am still hoping you will start listening. You abandoned me. Look at your actions honestly. And through all this, I still fucking love you, you hateful bitch. I will never stop loving you.)

I deserve this, I know. I wish I wasn't too chickenshit to put a stop to everything forever. You know you are really a loser when you even fail at suicide.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey. No matter what you DO NOT deserve this. Please, please don't take your life. I know things are hard and I've been there, but things will get better, even if it seems impossible right now.

Leah
Survivorthriver.blogspot.com